The Troubled Therapist

January 29, 2010

HIPAA and Play-Doh Huffing

Filed under: comedy,humor,Uncategorized — Chuck A Stetson @ 4:36 PM
Tags: , , ,

Sometimes I need to remind myself that the HIPAA laws have nothing to do with hippopotamus’ or hip replacement surgery. Imagine my surprise when of my former patients filed suit against me for revealing sensitive information concerning said patients addiction to huffing Play-Doh while simultaneously masturbating and listening to the Canadian National Anthem sung in Mandarin. Hey… I thought it would make for great comedy at the Please Say Something Funny Comedy Club and Sex Rehab Clinic’s open mike—held each Wednesday evening after the Nymphomaniac Poetry Slam. I was wrong.

The Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act of 1996 [HIPAA] Privacy and Security Rules has many rules I would have read had I not been concerned with not reading them. Patient confidentiality? Hey, I respect the doctor/patient privilege. I make all of my patients sign confidentiality forms concerning my confidentiality as it pertains to my ex-wives, ex-lovers, ex-secretaries [ex-wives and ex-lovers] and the occasional midget mud-wrestler who wanders into my office just to disrupt the disruption of the chaos that is serious psycho-analysis. Like I said, hippos and hip replacement surgery—I’m not perfect. I know I shouldn’t have used Peter Swerk’s real name when joking about his Play-Doh huffing while simultaneously masturbating and listening to the Canadian National Anthem sung in Mandarin.  It’s not like I said he was the same Peter Swerk who owned and operated Sewrk’s Swedish Massage and Barber College in Hartford. Oops…!

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